and waves washed me back to the shore

some family drama over here,
which pulls me harshly back to the reality of life.
and back to the starting point of many things.
im currently in a confused stage, of life. all over again.
i promise the post will end in a different note.

...

so my conclusion from this incident is:
for being sincere and loving, this is what i get in return.
for being nice, this is your attitude that my parents have to put up with.

is this a representation of life,
or am i microscoping into it too much?
and i got a conclusion. yes, life is indeed like this.
and the fuckiest thing is, we have to accept it this way.

but here's jocelyn's vow.

i will ammend my bad (based on the feedback from my mom and jiejie).
i want to grow up and be a good girl, not one who throws tantrums.
and, im going to continue to be sincere in life ;)

this incident has hit me hard, just like a broken relationship.
it had disheartened me about life once again.
but consurrently, it brought me back to the deep thoughts point,
from which i realised, and was reminded,
that i shall continue to stick to my principle of being truthful.
'cos there're still people who love me and whom i love.
out there, waiting for me to stand up after this cry.
i know there's at least one person who's waiting for me to
make him proud.
i won't let you down.

here's jocelyn. swimming towards the centre of the ocean. against the current. again.